I'm in Illinois, and I have internet. So there. I've found out the joys of windows games because my connection is practically 56k. (Although the DSL provider claims it's faster than dialup.) For those who may want to know, I'm a Jew from a suburb of New York. I've moved into the rural midwest, where I'm surrounded for a hundred miles by cornfields. The only thing here is the college and the gigantic Wal-Mart Supercenter. (And they mean supercenter!) Now that I have internet, I can look up porn, buy stuff online, look up porn, chat with my friends, look up porn, learn Yiddish and Hebrew, look up porn, download good freeware programs, look up porn, look up porn, and look up porn.

There are synagogues past the cornfields, but none in the town that I live in. However, there are four churches and an Islamic center. And the police guy hangs around the Islamic center waiting to pop people for speeding. Where I lived, there was a Zoroastrian temple. I guess every town needs their random place of worship.

I've left all my friends when I moved. But it's peaceful here. Nothing happens. Ever. Back in New York, there were two bomb threats on the school in one year, bandanna's are confiscated because of all the gang violence, and there were reports of rape. All within 10 minutes of my old house. Here, they're so secure, they call their High School sports team the Bombers. That's their name, not a nickname given to them by someone else.

I'm gonna stop raving now. God help us... in the future....